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Confusedone: My boyfriend of 4 months is appearing to be tired of me or upset with me.

Case Closed on
October 01, 2008 13:48
Judgment
   
The Wall

LIVING TOGETHER OR NOT??
Leapol2`s Argument
Leapol2
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His lease is up in April and he went ahead and signed on for another year without discussing it with me. Not that he has to check with me on things, it's just that it would be nice to be kept in the loop about things that affect my life as well as his.
Part of the problem is that he has a room-mate and I understand that you can't leave someone in the lurch like that. But he tells me after this was already done that they agreed that it would be best for them to stay there for another year. And he also then tells me that he was thinking we would move together somewhere in 2009. Again...thanks for making decisions about MY life without telling me first.
My situation is that I have to pay bills all alone and I make far less money. But for all intents and purposes 2 people live here every day. He does buy food etc for the house sometimes, which I DO appreciate. But I live day to day with no money to save or buy things I really need (honestly I have $20 in the bank) and he knows this and knows I really feel trapped and unhappy about the fact I feel I have no control over my own life. And I do resent the fact that he feels he has the right to come and go as he pleases, treat this as HIS home and then get annoyed if I complain about my life situation at all. He says he's not the cause of my problems, which is true, but he has no problem paying for his place just to help HIS ROOM-MATE pay for half the bills. I did the math per hour of his share of the rent here, $333 per month.It seems only fair to me if he wishes to live here every day.Barring that, my idea was have someone else move into his apt in his place. They have tons of friends that always need a place to live, so I see this as an ideal solution. Everyone benefits. His reply is that that may take a long time. I say how do you know if you haven't brought up the subject with your room-mate yet?
So his "brilliant" idea is to stay here less now.
So now I am furious and he doesn't see why.
Anyone else see why???


Pbrighton`s Argument
Pbrighton

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Girl, you're looking to get married,and he's not. he's a man, do you know how men works, obviously not.
the fact that you are calculating things by the hour...is creepy,and if you're looking for someone to ease your financial burden, you'll be losing that guy soon, if you keep up with this thinking.

Case Information
Views: 1254
75% of People thought Pbrighton was Wrong (4 total votes)
Category Relationship
Case was closed on October 01, 2008 13:32
Tags: living together, relationships, rent, room mates
URL:  Copy to Clipboard

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 COMMENTS AND RESPONSES
damiandt   115 days 7 hours 19 min. ago
That is the problem with getting the milk for free. If after a year he isn't interested in moving in with you, he's just not that interested. Because you said 17 months together right? His lease had to expire at some point.

So, dump him and get another man then. Lots of men out there.

Try Craigslist and find a room-mate if costs are so high. Times are tough and only you can solve your own problems.

If he's not interested in helping you, he just wants the perks without paying.
leapol2   297 days 22 hours 17 min. ago
No it is not HIS problem, nor is he the cause of my problems.
However, how is it fair or acceptable that he lives here every day rent free??
scaredtojeff   301 days 50 min. ago
It's not his problem.

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